Youth and the summer time



Youth and the Summer Time

In the name of Allah, the All-Merciful, the Ever-merciful.  All Prayers and Blessings of Allah be upon our master, the most noble Prophet Muhammad.  We praise Allah, thank Him, seek His help, guidance and forgiveness. We seek refuge in Allah from the evil in our souls and the sinfulness of our deeds.  “Whomever Allah guides, then he is right-guided, and whomever He leads away into error, then you will never find for him a right-minded patron” (TMQ, 18:17)[1].

This is not the latest hit movie.  It's the title of our lesson today.  I usually repeat this lesson at the beginning of every summer.  Summer, for many of the youth means;

-             How many girls am I going to know this year?

-             Will I be able to have a girl-friend this year too? 

-             Why can't I have a girl-friend while all my other friends have done it so easily? 

-             This year I will definitely make a girl-friend.

 

This is the summer time for many of our youth.  For some others it means; free-time.

 

Today's lesson will be a bit different.  It won't be a lecture or a speech, it will be in the form of questions and answers.  I got a huge number of questions, from mothers, fathers, youth… etc, on the internet and I will try to today to make some replies.  I have got the most recurrent and important questions for our lesson today.  . One of them came, for instance, in more than 500 e-mails. I have compiled 12 from them. So let me start by /with the first question.

 

1)      During the winter time I usually have a clear objective (to study and do well at school), but the summer time is always unclear for me.  I don't know what to do during the summer, they are just days going by.  I'm dutiful in my worship; I pray and I don't commit sins.  Still, I don't have any objective for spending my time during the summer.

 

This problem occupies the minds of many youth and parents.  Some of them have spoken out and expressed their problem whereas others are not even thinking about it.  Do you all have an objective to accomplish during this summer?  Let me even go a bit far and ask you all (parents and youth); what's your objective in life?  What do you want to accomplish in your life?  Do you have your objective written down?  How old are you? Eighteen years!?  Is it possible that a fully sane human being with a whole universe created at his service and as his background, with years and years passing by, and he or she still don't have any objective in their lives?  He is praying and she is wearing Hijab but still they don't know what to do!  Why are you all here today?  For what purpose have you been created?  Is it possible that you still don't know what to do with your life?

 

The young man who forwarded this problem to me said that his objective during the academic year is to pass the exams.  Can this be considered an objective?  Is it possible for anyone to have an objective during the winter, but nothing during the summer time?  Is it possible that you have passed 20 years of age and still with no objective in your life?

 

I was watching the eyes of the listeners when I asked the question, 'what's your objective in life?' and I could see that some of you were looking around them to see if they could read the thoughts of the others, to know what their objectives could be.  Is your objective something that you really believe in and strive to accomplish or is it just some nice talk?  Or is life just propelling you without any will of your own?

 

This is the life story of most of the youth sitting with us now:  When you were a child your parents told you that you have to go to school and that you have to study well or else they will be angry at you.  Then you studied at school for 12 years and graduated.  Then you calculated your credits to be able to know which university you'll be admitted to[2].  After four years of studying at university you got certain credits that you were told would allow you to work in such and such places.  So you got admitted in one of those places and you worked there.  When you thought of getting married you didn't choose, you just left those around you to choose for you saying that you will accept any woman who would accept you.  Then you got you married.  Then you got children.  Then you made money to raise your children.  Then you died.  And this was the end of the story.  I can see you all smiling, but let me ask you: Isn't this the story of thousands living among us?  Please don't let life propel you without any will of your own.  Don't be that passive person without any objective or real goal to strive for.  It's better to have a simple or an easy target than having no target at all or living on the margin of life.  Your target can be as trivial as: I want to gain money in order to build a life and get married, but at least it is a target.  It's true I don't approve of money being a sole target but at least it CAN be considered a target.  The worst thing in life is to have no target at all.

 

Believe me, it's not a matter of educational levels.  I know that many of you here could be highly educated in the best schools and universities.  But education alone does not establish the way you think nor does it produce the drive.  What are the criteria on which you will choose a husband?  You will reply; 'what criteria? I will marry anyone I find.  Husbands are not that abundant, you know.'  Is that possible?  Could this be the way you think?  What if you find two possible future husbands, which one will you choose?  You will say, 'the kindest of them', or, 'the richest'.  So what you're saying is that you have no clear plan or drive why or who you want to get married to!  And you do not have a clear plan or drive why you want to work in that particular company?  It's a catastrophe!  To have no target in life or be ignorant about what you want from life, is a total loss.

 

From our lesson today the first thing I want to accomplish is to have you think about your target in life.  When you go back home today, get a piece of paper and start thinking.  Have we been simply created to eat, drink, have children and die?  Is this possible?  All this universe, these skies, this earth, the angels coming down and going up, an angel on your right and angel on your left, divine books, prophets, messengers and martyrs dying… and all of this just for your good-self to eat and drink and sleep and have children and then die! How can your thinking be so naive and slow?  So, what is your target?

 

Let the first assignment for us during this summer be: set your goal in life.  Not just for the summer time, but for your whole life.  This is not just for the youth, it is for everyone; married, unmarried, young and old: A whole nation that has no target or goal.  Let me tell you plainly; as long as we are a nation without a target, our enemies will keep humiliating us because we don't even know what to aspire for.

 

How many of our attendants today have clear targets? What percent of them have such objectives? Ten percent!  What about the rest?  Are they just living like this without a target; going to lessons and returning back from lessons, praying, doing daily duties, studying!  This is all good, but simply not enough.

 

Let me tell you one thing that might be a bit harsh.  Those who lead their lives without any mission or target are sheep-like not really humans.  If it's a matter of eating and drinking then the hippopotamus is better than you, because it eats more than six times of what you eat and drink.  If it's a matter of having children then the rabbit would be much better than you because it gets countless baby rabbits during its lifetime.  So why are you living?  Please set your goal and write it down.

 

I was so touched when I learned that the children (from 8 to 12 years) in the United States have a weekly class called, "set your goal in life".  Do you believe this!

 

You might ask me, 'are you coming here today to talk to us about religion or about life?'  To tell you the truth I don't even know how to separate them from each other!  They are both about life!   If you don't have a target in life then you will never be a dutiful Muslim.  If you don't have a target and you get into religion you'll be easily carried away with every passing strife or current.  You stumble and fall down so easily because you don't have a clear objective or mission.  Let me ask you this, 'what will shield you against sin?'  The answer is, to have a target in life.  At least all the passing currents won't find you an easy and an available prey!  You will be busy with your message in life and with striving for your target.  The children in the US from 8 to 12 have a weekly class helping them to set goals for their lives!!  When I asked you about your target in life and some of you were taken by surprise, I remembered that this same question is asked to children who are only 8 years old!  That's why they are successful.

 

At that early age they begin to awaken children to the fact that they have to set a goal for their lives!  It's true they are still very young but they propose many options to help children set their goal; computer, drawing, mechanics.. etc.  When the child gets attracted to any of these options, like say, computer, they instantly get him moving in that direction by getting him a PC and by instigating him to know more about it even during the summer time. 

 

This starts as early as 8 years.  I'm saying this to the youth who sleep till 3 pm during the summer time. 

 

When the summer vacation is over and the child returns back to school the next year, he finds out that a full report has been drawn about his progress during the summer.  He finds out that things are serious and not just talk.  So the child starts paying more and more attention.  In 20 years we look at that child and find him the best computer engineer in the whole world.  We wonder how he became like that!  Is it because they are more advanced in their educational material?  No, not just that. They have the right starting point: what's your target in life?

 

Have you realized now the value of this question?  Can you see now why they are successful while we aren't?  How are we going to awake our nation and get better if we lack the way to start?

 

For those who study business administration you all know that for any company to start the first issue that has to be covered in any business plan is: the mission.  Why are we going to make this company?  If you have a number of investors who have a certain technology (like making watches or mobiles, for instance), if these investors have the capital needed for forming a company, they don't just go ahead and form it.  They get together at least for the first six months to set their mission.  They do this when they want to invest just some money, so what about a whole human being without a mission?

 

I'm sorry that I'm always getting you examples from western countries only. I'm sorry I can't get you examples from our Arab countries because unfortunately I can't find any in my mind.

 

A company like Sony was established 30 years ago.  They set their mission 30 years ago and it was: the Japanese product will be product number one in the American markets.  If anyone had listened to this mission 30 ago, he would have said that it's pure imagination.  But these people had a clear mission.  During board meetings if a member of the board suggested opening a new branch in any part of the world the Chairman and the rest of the members would always check the mission first to see how this suggestion would serve the mission before accepting or refusing it. The mission is the aspect that draws the future direction and decides the policy.

 

Can you do that?  Can you set your mission first to see if marrying this person will help you accomplish your mission or not?  Can you set your mission first to see if working in this company will help you accomplish your mission or not?  Can you organize and run your life that way?

 

The one who lives his life randomly and runs it randomly will also die randomly; a ZERO in life.  How many zeros do we have in our lives?  In all the sea of faces I see in front of me now, who will be more distinguished?  The one with the mission.

 

I visited a company in Egypt lately and all the time I was going between the offices I found everywhere, "Our mission: …”  In the lift, in the corridors, in the chairman's office.. everywhere.

 

How can you bear living your life without a mission?

 

I once came across an animated cartoon called 'Alice in Wonderland', a funny children story aired on TV for kids, although it seems childish, it is very expressive.

 

Alice was walking until she met a little rabbit. When she reached a crossroad, she asked the rabbit, “Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"

 

" That depends a good deal on where you want to get to?", asked the rabbit in turn.

 

"I don't know", replied Alice.

 

"Then it doesn’t matter which way you go ", said the rabbit.

 

Does this ring a bell? Since you have no idea which way to take, it does not matter where to go, because all the roads will be alike.

 

Can you write down your objective today?  Our friend who sent us the problem has a winter objective but he has no summer one.  Why don't you set an objective for your whole life?  And let this be the only thing you'll gain from this lesson, even if you had to leave now before listening to what I have to say next.

 

We once were having a lesson and I asked all the attendants to write down their objectives.  Then I asked them to pass the papers to me.  I was astonished with what they wrote down:

 

-          One man wrote: My objective in life is to live in peace.  What's this?  What objective is this?  Does this person even understand what life is all about?  The whole life is ups and downs.  We live our life in constant attempts to succeed and we are liable to face failure and desperation.  Then we attempt to try again and again.  We succeed once and fail once.  So how can we live in peace?  Do you want to be like stagnating water?

-          One lady wrote: My objective is to be happy with my children.   This is very generic talk?  What exactly does it mean?  Where's the objective in this? 

 

So we have all agreed that we must have an objective in our lives but we don't know how to put it down in writing!  Does anyone here know?

 

If you want to put your objective down in writing ask yourself this question; why have I been created in this world?  If you know the answer to that you will know how to set your goal in life.  I know that you all know the theoretical reply.

 

Let’s imagine that we have a mike and went down to the streets asking people this obvious question and let’s imagine the answers:

 

One person would say:  Allah Knows the wisdom, and that's it.  Yes it's true that Allah knows the wisdom of creating us and the universe, but don't you even want to try to think?

 

Believe me, no one will know the reply to that question except a Muslim who knows the Qur'an.  Even the scholars and philosophers got all mixed up in answering that question:

 

Plato answered by saying: God wanted to create the universe, so HE did, but then HE forgot about it, hence all these conflicts among people. But Allah answered by this ayah, that can be translated as, " ..and your Lord is never forgetful" (TMQ, 19:64).  How can the Creator forget His creation?  How can that be when every drop of rain is coming down destined for that person or that one to drink it?  That person will drink it after it covers a full trip through rivers and valleys and taps and bottles… over days and months and even years, ending up at the end in the cup of that particular person because it was destined for him all from the very beginning.  How can you say that Allah forgot His creation after all that??!!  How can that ever be? 

 

Karl Marx answered: God created this universe in play and without any purpose. Allah answered by this verse, that can be translated as, “Did you think that We had created you in play (without any purpose) and that you would not be brought back to Us". "So Exalted is Allah, the True King." (TMQ, 23:115-116).                                               

 

Elia Abu-Mady the poet, answered in a very long poem that he called 'The Jargons'.  He expresses what goes in the minds of many people but they can't spell it out. He said:

 

I came, but I don't know where from, but come I did!

And I saw in front of me a road, so I walked!

                                                             

And I will keep walking whether I liked it or not!

How did I come? I don't know.

 

Where am I going? I don't know!

           

 

Allah answers this question in the Qur'an in the ayah (verse) that can be translated as, "And I (Allah) created not the jinn and mankind except that they should worship Me (Alone)" (TMQ, 51:56) "Except that they should worship Me", does not mean that you will only live your life for worship. It means that pleasing Allah must be your objective number one in life. Consequently, making those who are living around you happy and guiding them to Allah should be your objective number one in life.  This ayah means, "worship Me and get the whole earth to worship Me".  If you do that, then you will accomplish the purpose you were created for, and this could very well be your objective in life: To please Allah, to worship Allah and to get every living soul to worship Him, to take the hands of your friends and neighbors, to succeed in your life as a dutiful Muslim so that everyone would love this religion, to liberate Palestine so the worshipers can practice their rituals freely, to get married to a woman who can help you in your mission, to get children who can worship Allah… etc.  Can you have such an objective?  Can you write down such an objective?  Don't accept to live your life as a simple ZERO!  Go now and write down your objective, please.

 

One of my friends, who is very persistent not to take a step unless it is with a purpose, was getting married.  He asked his fiancée to get a paper so they would write down their objective from being married.  Instead of looking dreamingly into each others’ eyes as all engaged people do these days, my friend did something totally different to get to know his fiancée better.  Islam is asking us to reduce the talk of affections and love during engagements so the couple would have a clear mind to know each other properly without being entangled in the web of desire that blinds the mind from anything else but stratifying these desires.  So, in order for the couples to know and understand each other they have to steer clear of desire and be more focused on minds and ways of thinking.

 

My friend and his fiancée both wrote down the objectives, each in a piece of paper.  My friend wrote: 1) Pleasing Allah, 2) Pleasing my wife, 3) Pleasing myself.  His fiancée wrote: 1) Pleasing Allah, 2) Pleasing myself, 3) Pleasing my husband. So they both agreed that Allah is the first to be pleased, and then comes either of them according to the order they specified.  From that day on they always used to ask themselves; does this thing please Allah? If yes, then they would do it.  If not, then they don't do it.  When something neutral comes along the way like; where to go to this summer?  If they had two options like; the northern coast and Hurghada, the husband would choose the option that would please his wife more because she is the second to be pleased after Allah according to him.

 

I know another couple who couldn't have children for more than 10 years and when they finally got one, they decided to write down the objective from raising this child.  They decided that the objective will be that this child will grow up to be a man who would die a martyr while liberating Palestine.  Once agreed they started building the whole policy of how they will bring him up and in which schools he will be taught… etc.  all based on the objective they both set together.

 

Believe me when you set your goal your life, only then you will be happy.  You were created for a purpose and will never be at peace with yourself till you set for your life the goal you were created for.  Have you ever heard of a person who bought a fridge then suddenly decided to take all the food out of it and use it instead for keeping his shoes?  What would you say about such a person?  Crazy?  I'm sure you'll have a lot of other adjectives.  So what about the human being that was created by Allah for a specific purpose, but that human being did something totally different or against the purpose he was created for?  The two examples are the same, believe me.  This human being, this creature having specific contents in him, was created for a specific purpose because at the end he will either go to heaven or to hell.  This human being, emptied himself from the contents that suited the purpose he was created for and instead he placed other contents totally inconsistent and unsuitable to the purpose he was created for.  In our example, the fridge will go out of order and the shoes will be totally unfit for use… so what about the human being?

 

I'm not asking you to live your life in worship.  On the contrary, I want you to go out and have fun and eat and practice sports… all of this with Allah in your mind.

 

"..they should worship Me" has many shapes and forms. If you write down your objective as follows: I want to make an invention that would be useful to all the Muslims.  I will work round the clock in my science lab.  I will make for the Muslim nation something to be proud of instead of being mediocre in everything.   Another objective can be: I will teach the Qur'an to my whole neighborhood.  So I will teach myself first.  Another objective: I will make all my friends love Allah.  Another one objective: My whole family will all be diligent in serving Islam.  Our house will be the Kiblah (known by all believers in search of help or assistance, be it material or intellectual) of all believers.

 

2)      I am a university student, very vital and full of energy and power.  Things become so difficult for me during the summer time (you all know why), what do I do?  I'm afraid of temptation and I don't want to fall into sin?

 

I have a recipe for this student.  We could all be facing the same situation.  I will tell you how to use your energy and vitality without falling into the trap of sin:

 

1.      Practice a sport:  What's that?  Is this a lesson in religion or in sports?  You have to practice a sport because this energy of yours needs an outlet and sport is an important outlet for controlling all this energy. If you don't take it out in sport I'm afraid that it might get out in sin.  You have it in you any way, so get it out in sports!  How many of you practice sports regularly?  How many of you (at their early twenties) can jog round the block without choking and coughing their hearts out because of smoking?  Don't you want to be successful and serve Islam?  How can you do that when you are still starting your life and you cannot even breathe straight after 3 minutes of running?  Look at the prophet (SAWS)[3] when he was over 50 years.  He was visited once by a sturdy wrestler named Rucana.  This man was an invincible wrestler and the prophet knew that the only logic this man would understand is the logic of power and strength.  He stood in front of the prophet and told him, "If you defeat me, I'll follow you".  The prophet at that time was over 50, so he replied, "Ok".  Then he struck him instantly and all of a sudden the man found himself lying on the ground.  He stood up quickly wondering how something like that could have happened to him. He then told the prophet that he must have underestimated him and that the prophet took him by surprise. He asked the prophet to strike him again and the prophet did it again.  The man was bewildered and asked the prophet to do it a third time, which the prophet did.  So the wrestler became a Muslim after he was taken by that prophet who excelled in everything; religion and sports.  Can you be like our prophet?  Even the ladies have to practice some sports, not in the middle of the street or in mixed gyms but in closed halls or private gyms for ladies.  When the prophet was preparing the army for the battle of Badr he refused to take anyone less than 15 years.  A boy named Samra (14 years old) came to the prophet and told him, "O prophet of Allah, I'm good at throwing spears.  Why won't you take me with you?  At least try me out first".  So the prophet asked him to demonstrate his skills.  When the prophet tried him out and found him very precise he took him with him, though he was below the required age, why?  Because the boy was so distinguished in his throwing skills.  Another boy named Rafei, 13 years old, came along and said, "And why would you leave me O prophet of Allah.  I can strike and defeat the boy you have just accepted now".  So the prophet asked him to wrestle with Samra.  When Rafei defeated Samra, the prophet took both of them in the army.  So, practice a sport regularly!  Men and ladies.

2.      Fasting:  I know how difficult it is during the summer time.  Fasting during the daytime and sports in the evening.  Can you sin after all that?  You won't be able to raise a finger, right?  You'll regulate all your energy if you follow that regime.  From where would you get the energy for sin after all that?  Listen to this narration: Narrated Abdullah:  We were with the Prophet while we were young and had no wealth whatever. So Allah's Apostle said, "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power.[4]"   If our prophet told us so, then fasting will indeed diminish your power.  Just be careful not to do either of these two things: don't fast the whole summer because the prophet forbade us from doing that and don't be a menace to your parents by refusing to sit with them because you are fasting and you eat at different times.  Please your parents and fast.

3.      Get busy with calling people to Allah:  Get busy with your religion and your real mission on earth.  When you are consumed with your mission no sin will ever find a way to your heart. 

4.      Supplication to Allah:  Call Allah and ask Him to fend off any sins away from you.  Ask him to protect you and assist you in avoiding sin.

 

Why don't we all make our motto this summer: A summer without sin.

 

How?  By; sports, fasting, getting busy with calling people to Allah and supplications.

 

I think that with this recipe sin will never find a way to you.

 

3)      My father suggested for me some summer training in a company and I want to spend this summer in worship and reading the Qur'an, what would you advice?  If this summer training is in a foreign country, do you advice me to go or to refuse the whole thing?

 

First thing I want to tell you all, even before getting into this question, is that you should all get proper practical training.  How many of the youth are attending here today?  Thousands?  What's the value of all these youth when they graduate only to discover that they lack the proper training needed for their practical life?  If around 20,000 students graduate each year from the faculty of commerce, where do they all go?  I myself am a graduate of the same faculty so we are all in the same boat.  So out of this huge number, which ones are more distinguished than the others. The ones who are distinguished are either one of three: 1) One who excels in a foreign language, 2) One who excels in computer, 3) One who has taken summer training in a company throughout his years in university.  If you want to be distinguished, then work during the summer time.  If you want to spend your time in worship and reading Qur'an why don't you do that during the evening?  But in the morning you must work.  Build your future at an early age and make use of the summer time.  Can you imagine what will become of us if the West deprived us from their technology?  We will go back 70 years!!  Take our dairy factories for instance, do you imagine that no Arab country can yet manufacture the simple plastic cover used for closing the milk cartons?  If we don’t get this plastic piece our milk won't be packed!  Our lesson today is not just in religion, it is a comprehensive lesson to cover all the aspects of life.  This lesson is to set your thinking straight.  I wish that you all would take the intention to work and succeed during this summer!  The interaction that comes with work environment helps enhancing personalities.  If you work during the summer for every year while studying you will graduate with tangible practical experience. 

 

Allah loves his worshipers to be experienced in practical life.  Look at Musa "Moses" (AS)[5].  He was brought up in a real mansion.  Someone with these refined and sophisticated manners wouldn't have managed well with the Israelites.  They needed someone with real street-life experience.  That's why he had to be a shepherd for 10 years!  He fled from Egypt and he went to Madian and couldn't even find food.  After he went through all this turmoil for years he became ready for the Israelites, ready to start reforming them. 

 

Work experience gives that type of knowledge, so the earlier you start your summer training the better format you'll be able to fit in when you graduate.  I'm calling all parents not to give any allowances to their adult children this summer.  Don't be angry at me, you should rather be happy.  This is an advice that I'm giving you.  What do you need this allowance for?  To buy some sweats?  Aren't you ashamed of yourself!  When you earn your own allowance only then will you refuse to go and buy this stupid tight tank-top or that stupid tight body to show off your muscles.  Only then will you realize the value of money because you did not earn it so easily.  Brothers, one of the main causes of triviality is having free time.  Triviality is the main reason behind the youth's trivial and stupid targets-like; a young boy going every day starting at 7 pm with his car up and down the street, horning and screeching and you all know what he's looking for, yes?  This girl would insult him and that girl would shout at him and he keeps getting more and more trivial and petty.  Or another boy would start dialing any numbers sporadically to see if anyone would make a conversation with him.  Oh my God, are you that trivial?  He keeps hearing insults but he just goes on with the hope of finding someone to make a conversation with.  What a personality?  Some go chatting without any purpose over the internet and plotting how to trick girls into getting attracted to him.  Oh my God, can this triviality come in a nation whose prophet was Muhammad (SAWS)?  Can this petty character be the grandson of Omar Ibnul-Khattab?  Are you content with being so mean and low?

 

So you have to work, even if it is for free, you will still learn.

 

What if you had a chance to travel to a foreign country?  Yes, you can go, why not?  On one condition don't ever accept to work in something that's not in your specialty.  Don't demean yourself by accepting to wash dishes.  When you get a chance to travel through your university or through another company, only then will you gain more and better experience.  We want our young Muslims to learn and be better, so go abroad.  And when you get there go to an internet café and search for the locations of the mosques so you would go and pray there.  Take your Qur'an with you and read from it.  Your dutifulness to your worship will protect you from sin.  These are the conditions if you want to travel to a foreign country.  If you can't work these conditions out then you might as well stay in your own country.

 

4)      This question was the most recurrent and I got it from a girl, she said:  A lot of boys and girls get into passing romances during the summer time.  I'm afraid of getting carried away with such romances, what can I do and how can I advice my other girl-friends who have boy-friends?

 

I get this question a lot during the summer time, so I want to start my reply with stressing certain meanings and I will approach this issue from a very objective and logical view:

 

-    The dangers of having friends from the opposite sex among teenagers: When Allah brought this issue in the Qur'an, He brought it as a rule and this rule was specifically directed to women, not to men.  Because it is the girl who actually holds the reign of whether to go on or stop the relation.  So in Surat An-Nissa (Women), Allah says what can be translated as, "…or taking mates to themselves" (TMQ, 4:25).  So, don't have a mate from the other sex, don't have a boy-friend because this is absolutely forbidden.  But, why did Allah gives us this order?  Hasn't He created our emotions?  So why do things have to be so tight and uneasy?  Man and women long for each other by instinct and this is how they were created, so is the issue just to make things difficult?  Of course not!  The issue is that the only allowed friendship between man and woman is within the institution of "marriage".  Outside this institution no friendships are allowed between people of the opposite sex.  So why are things that way in Islam?  Let us set religion aside and let us discuss this issue open-mindedly.  Let us take a couple; a boy and a girl still in university and who have a strong love relationship.  They see each other as the perfect mates and they can't imagine life without each other.  The boy still needs to finish university studies, then get drafted into the army, then he has to work so that he can afford to buy an apartment… etc.  In brief he needs not less than 10 years to get married.  Still they are both confident that they will eventually get married.   Let me ask you this: In all the love relations between students, what percent of them end up getting married?   One of you is saying 0.25% ?  No, let it be 1% because I'm sure it never even exceeds that figure.  Don't be overly optimistic by thinking that you will be from this 1% please.  So, 99% start these relations and end up not getting married.  What happens to a girl at the expense of these broken relations?  The girl is usually the one who gets most of the suffering.  Her heart is broken and she takes the full blow and she feels so hurt especially if her boy-friend left her to start a relation with her intimate friend, as the famous scenario that keeps going round.  Or maybe her parents would refuse to get her married to this boy friend!  After 5 years or so of friendship they try to get married but their parents refuse.  Doesn’t this happen a lot?  Or the boy might change his mind totally after he grows up and after he thinks maturely.  Who suffers at the end?  The girl.  Even the boys would get hurt, so what of the girls!  Allah doesn’t want the hearts of our girls to be broken, or to suffer, or to collapse.  Allah wants you to worship Him only, not for you to worship a passing relation.  In marriage love would find a natural outlet thus keeping a good balance between your affections and your worship to Allah.  Any other sort of love, outside marriage, will always affect your relation with Allah.

 

-    The second thing is that your boy-friend will know one, two or three girls then end up marrying a totally different girl.  Same with the girl, she will know one or two boys and end up marrying another one. What will happen inside their sub-conscious minds?  An inevitable comparison will impose itself in her mind; between her husband and between the boy-friend she used to know.  What a catastrophe!  I get lots and lots of stories from married ladies who are still thinking about their past boy-friends.  Infidelity!  She’s dreaming of another man, not her husband!  See now why homes are broken?  I can tell you that almost 60% of divorces these days are mainly due to pre-marital relations!  And look at the dilemma of a woman who has known her boy-friend for three years but has only been married to her husband for one or two year.  Which one of them does she know better?  She’s comparing now her husband, a man loaded with responsibilities, to her boy-friend, who used to take an allowance from his father and who used to come to see her in his tiptop clothes and his sleek hair… so cool and without any responsibilities.  So in whose favor will this unfair comparison end up?  Had you known your husband before marriage he would have been exactly in the same shoes of your ex-boy-friend.  So the comparison is totally unfair.  She would say, ‘my husband is a kind man, but my ex-boy-friend was totally different; so cool and much fun to be with’.  The man will also say the same, ‘my wife is kind, but my ex-girl-friend was so chic and always wearing make-up’.  Of course she is always wearing make-up, why wouldn’t she?  And how can your wife wear make-up while she sleeps next to you every night?  This is how homes are broken!  It’s like Allah is asking us to refrain from any love relations before marriage so as to maintain our happiness after marriage.  So are you willing to sacrifice the happiness of your lifetime just to enjoy the very brief pleasure of 2 or 3 years?

 

-    I will never forget a mother who used to say, ‘I wish one day to see my son having a girl-friend.  I wish so much for that day to come’.  She even used to push him to have girl-friends.  Some girls even have boy-friends with the knowledge of their mothers while the fathers know nothing about it.  Brothers and sisters, please don’t look at the momentary pleasure, look a bit far ahead of you.  Don’t bring misery to your own doorstep.

 

-    Do you realize that every time you go out with a girl behind her parents’ back that you are betraying them?  Does every girl realize that she’s betraying her parents when she sneaks out from behind their back to see her boy-friend?  Narrated Ibn Omar:   The Prophet said, "Every betrayer will have a flag which will be fixed on the Day of Resurrection, and the flag's prominence will be made in order to show the betrayal he committed.[6]”  So imagine a girl coming on the day of judgment with a flag on which is written that she betrayed her father!  I’m asking all the youth to cut off their love relations with the other sex now.  Don’t go on with such relations please because Allah would never bless them.  How can Allah bless a relation that He forbids?  The only exception is in case these couple are about to get married.  In that case I would ask them to hasten their marriage by all means.  I’m saying all this to you with the assumption that this relation is platonic.  But can you imagine a platonic relation lasting for 5 years or more?  Step by step you end up in sin without even feeling it.  The number of youth who fall into sin during the summer is a real shock!  Specially the young teenagers!  Fear for yourself and don’t ever place yourself in a compromising position.  Let us raise the banner: A summer without sin.  Please don’t think that the purpose from this lesson is for you to have a dull summer.  No.  Is a summer without sin = a dull summer?  Can the only enjoyment be in sin?  You will have fun and you will go out with your friends and you will practice sports and laugh.. Just stay away from sin, that’s all I’m asking you to do.  You do a lot to come close to Allah; praying, fasting, attending lessons.  Then a simple sin comes to drag you down to the pits for the end of your life.  Don’t fall because you won’t be able to rise again.  Don’t live in fantasies.  Just hang on there till you are able to get married. Then get married.

 

-    I’m asking you to do two things: 1) Understand what I have just told you now and weigh it well in your minds, 2) Worship Allah. The more closer you get to Allah the farther you will get away from sin and the more difficult it will be.  The sweetness of being close to Allah can never be compared to any other pleasure.  Allah says what can be translated as, “And benignancy is not to come up to the homes from their backs; but benignancy is for man to be pious; and come up to the homes by their doors, and be pious towards Allah, so that possibly you would prosper” (TMQ, 2:189).  So don’t come up to the homes from the chatting or from the phones or from behind the parents’ backs.

 

-    Never enter a home from its window, or through the internet or telephone, or without the permission of the father. Do not ever do that, for this is a form of treason.  The primary way out for those involved in such affairs is to strengthen their bond with Allah, for example, by performing umrah[7], supplicating plentifully, praying two raka’as[8] everyday to ask Allah to allow you to become closer to Him, learning the rules of tajweed[9], reading more Qur'an, attending religious lectures; gradually you will change. You will soon realize the worthlessness of this affair, and how it seems less important than before. I want to give the girls another piece of advice that may appear to be a joke at first. Do you want to leave him tomorrow? Try this experiment. When you next meet him, walk with him for a while, then say to him, “Oh! Watch out! That's your sister over there with some guy in his car!” What will he do? One of two things: he will either leave you to run and save his sister, in which case you will realize your true value to him. He can willingly do this to you, but he would not allow it for his sister. On the other hand, he might tell you that he has no problem with it, in which case you will see his value! He has no third option.  I am urging girls to try this, and I am sure that you will not accept to continue in such an affair unless he comes and proposes to your parents to marry you.

 

5)      Let us move on to the next question: “I do not want to travel with my family on a beach holiday this year because I am afraid of the sins that occur there, especially those related to the beach itself. Should I go or should I stay?

 

His family is going on vacation to a seaside resort and he intends not to accompany them. Let us approach this issue from several angles. Firstly, we do not want gaps to form between our young men and their families. If your parents are going and you are not, until when will we stay separated like this? Have you forgotten what our homes are like from the inside these days? This vacation may be the only chance for the family to come together. Why? Let me tell you how our homes look from within. The father is absent all day long, and he comes home very tired in the evening. He eats, watches some television, then goes to sleep. The mother is constantly busy. The kids are also in separate worlds. One of them is playing on the internet, the other is talking on the phone for more than two hours at a time, and the young children are playing on their gaming consoles. Isn't this true? Is this a home? This is a family that is never brought together. Grudgingly, they sometimes meet on Fridays for lunch, the son always comes late because he is with his friends, and the house is torn apart. The vacation could be the golden opportunity to bring the family together, and it could be your golden opportunity to guide your family. You say that you do not want to go with them to avoid sin, but I want you to go with them to take them by the hand. I know a man who rents a villa in the summer especially for the purpose of bringing his entire family together.

 

Another point is that we do not want our young men to live in isolation from society. I disagree with you, but this does not mean that I am telling you to indulge yourself in sin. All I am saying is that you can accompany your family on their vacation, and avoid any place where a severe sin will take place. However, why not accompany them in normal, sinless activities? Do not try to convince me that everything there is totally sinful.

 

Furthermore, we want you to have a good time during the summer. This idea in itself is religious. We do not want you to spend the whole year studying, attending religious lectures, memorizing Qur'an, and guiding your friends, without having any fun. Does Islam allow having fun? Yes! The Prophet (SAWS)[10] used to compete in races with his wife Aisha every week. On one occasion, the companions were gathered together, eating watermelon, when they started to throw the seeds at each other and to laugh. Can you imagine the Prophet's companions doing that! When a man heard about this incident, he asked Abdullah Ibn-Omar (RA)[11] if the Prophet's companions really did laugh! We sometimes imagine them as if they were always frowning! Abdullah Ibn-Omar answered him in astonishment, “Did they laugh?! They used to laugh and laugh, but with faith in their hearts more solid than mountains.” Notice this balance. I can laugh as much as I choose; we want you to be merry, we want you to have fun and to laugh. We want you to play, swim, and be happy, but without sinning! We will do all these things without sinning. You will find the right time to go to the beach, you will choose the right place to sit, you will choose your company, and you will spend time with your family. This point is crucial, you should travel with your family, and you should make them satisfied.

 

Fine then, but what should I do when I’m there? There are a few things we must agree to do there; things that are only possible while there. One of them is a kind of worship that is close to extinct: the contemplation of Allah's creation. You will not be able to perform it unless you go on a vacation to the sea, because our huge crowded cities do not allow anyone to raise their head and ponder. You can stand in front of the sea; as you listen to the sound of waves, you will say, “and decidedly not a thing (is) except that it extols His praise, but you do not comprehend their Extolment” (TMQ, 17:44). This wave is worshipping Allah; this breeze is glorifying Allah, and this particle of sand is saying there is no god but Allah. Observing sunset, you would say, “You insert the night into the daytime and You insert the daytime into the night” (TMQ, 3:27), and exalt him by thinking, ‘Glorified be Allah; the dominion of the heavens and the earth’. Everyone else is going to the sea to play and have fun, while you are going to do two things: you are going to play and to contemplate the creation of Allah (AWJ)[12], saying to Him, “Glory is to You, the Eternal Owner of Sovereignty.” You can do this everyday at dusk and dawn.

 

What else should you do there? It will be a chance to get closer to your parents. There will be time for you to approach your father, to talk to him, and to befriend him. Your relationship with him has become cold, limited to you asking him for money and him giving you orders. Let us transform this relationship into a friendship. Let us transform it into a relationship of love that can draw you both together.

 

There remains a third thing that you can do while there. Why not worship Allah while there? Go there with the intention to use your free time to do more. How beautiful will qiyam[13] be whilst there? You will ask me, how can anyone even think of qiyam whilst on vacation? There is a beautiful hadith that says, “Worshiping during the period of widespread turmoil is like emigration towards me.”[14] The one who worships Allah while others are playing is equal to the one who emigrated from Makkah to Madinah to meet the Prophet (SAWS). Take this hadith with you on your journey - write it down and place it in front of you. I am going to the Prophet (SAWS). Imagine a person who is going on vacation with the intention of praying qiyam every night, who has the time to do so. Everyday he reads Qur'an from sunset until the evening and then performs two raka'as of qiyam. Amongst all this beauty, amongst all the others, you are singled out with your worship. You will be from the first ones who Allah will look at when He looks at this long beach and finds you standing out from all the rest. Therefore, we should go, have a good time, worship Allah, get closer to our family, exercise and so on.   

 

6)      The next question is, “My friends are very far from Allah's path, and I do not have any other friends but them. What should I do in the summer, bearing in mind that they are all I have?”

 

Let me answer this question quickly. Be aware of bad company, especially in summer. No one dares to do a sin unless it comes through a friend. One of the worst things I detest most amongst youth is to drink alcohol, and I seek refuge in Allah from that. Although having desire for women is a great sin, it is normal at this age. But drinking is inexcusable: how can you disobey Allah so easily? How could you befriend this boy after knowing that he drinks? How could you befriend someone who drinks and takes drugs? Drinking will spread in the summer. Do not allow yourself to go near it, and watch out for bad company. Your fall into sin starts with a bad friend. Tell me who your friends are, and I will tell you whether you will sin this summer or not. Will Allah protect you or not? You will tell me, “I have no other friends, where will I go?” I prefer that you go without friends rather than stick to a friend who will lead you to hellfire. Many young men come to the verge of reaching faith, but deviate and end up in hellfire because of one friend. Many young men start to become rightly guided but fall into sin and forget the path of religiousness thanks to their friends.

 

I do not want you to leave your friends completely if you cannot. However, I have two requests. Never travel on vacation with them, and never go out with them at night.  If you insist on continuing to know these bad friends, and if there is truly no other way, I beg you to leave these two things. However, if you surrender, this means that you want to commit these sins. You can meet them all day long, but not at night. Do not stay with them until late at night, and do not go on vacation with them, because these are the best times for sin to flourish. How will your relationship with them become? It will be normal. It will include visiting each other and going out, but not late at night.  Search for good company. Why do you think you are listening to this lecture now, you will find that it is because of your good companions. You will find this good company in mosques. Within a month or two, you will be able to find someone to befriend. The mosque you go to is in your district, which means that the people you will meet there will be from the same social background, which will help you to get more familiar with them quickly. Of course I do not mean that Islam puts barriers between social backgrounds, for there is no doubt that we are all equal. What I mean is that if you fear that befriending religious people means being around people who are boring and dull, you are mistaken. Do not worry, you will find people like yourself. Pray in the mosque and ask Allah to send you good companions. Omar Ibn-Al-Khattab said that nothing remains from the beauty of life except a good friend who takes you by the hand to obey Allah.

 

Look out for the pious, befriend them, and invite them to be your brothers and sisters in Allah.  Omar Ibnul-khattab said, “If you see kindness from a brother in faith, hold on to him, for this is a rare occurrence.” You will find this type of person, just be patient, ask Allah for it, and keep away from bad friends.  Do not wait until you find the good friends to leave the bad ones; leave them immediately and make a fresh start in the summer.  You are going to face many temptations and Satan is waiting for any opportunity.

 

As for parents, do you know who your children’s friends are?  Do not wait until they start to take drugs.  That does not mean to watch their every move, but be creative.  You can tell your son, “Why don’t you invite your friends to dinner? We are generous people, and I will prepare something special for you.”  This way you can see for yourself who their friends are.  Now I have spoiled the plan by telling it in front of the youth! I did not know where to say it so that they would not hear it; however, this is what parents should do.

 

7)      The seventh question is not actually a question but a request. This is a request from a mother whose son passed away last summer in a car crash on the north coast motorway in Egypt.  She is asking us to remind young people of what happened to her son.

 

I urge you not to speed.  If you die in a fatal crash because of speeding, your reckoning will be very severe indeed.  Even if you were sitting next to somebody who was driving quickly and you were encouraging him, you will be held accountable. Do you know why?

 

You were careless with the soul that Allah entrusted you with.  The soul is very precious, and you should only put it at risk to uphold Islam.  Do not waste it over a trivial matter such as speeding.  How can you guarantee the state of the roads?  There are young people who are very good drivers dying in car accidents nearly every day.

Consider for a moment the number of young people who have died in the last few months. I personally know over twenty cases; turn to the obituaries and you will see the number of young people dying.  Therefore avoid sins this summer. Repeat our slogan, “a summer without sins.”  I will have fun, but I will not sin.  Be careful, the number of young people dying is high.  Beware of speeding.

 

8)      “What should I read this summer?”

 

We are at the beginning of the summer.  This means that we have time.  Therefore let us agree on a reading list.  I will recommend a few books that will give you a solid foundation to build upon.  I recommend four books only, but you have to read them this summer.  The first book is “Fikh Asseerah” (understanding the life of the Prophet) by Sheikh Said Ramadan Al-Buty.  Last year I recommended a book called “Arraheek al-makhtoom” (The Sealed Nectar), so if you have read it please read this book which is a much better book because it tells you how to understand the life of the Prophet and what you can learn from the biography of the Prophet.  It is not just a story, it also includes the lessons.  The second book is “Fikh Assunnah, (Understanding the Tradition of the Prophet, especially part 1) by Sheikh Sayyed Sadek.  This book tells you all you need to know about how the Prophet performed wudu’ (ablution), prayed, fasted and so on in detail.

 

All you need to know about the five pillars of Islam are in this part, so you do not need the other two parts now.  All you need is the first part.  You need to know it almost by heart so that by the end of the summer you know the Prophet’s tradition, including every detail.

 

The third book is the interpretation of the thirtieth juzu (chapter) of the Qur’an.  I do not want you to read the interpretation of the whole Qur’an now, just the last juzu.  Read the interpretation from two books, the first one is Mukhtasar Tafseer Ibn-Katheer (The Abridged Interpretation of Ibn-Katheer).  The integral text is very difficult, so I recommend sticking to the abridged version.  Read the thirtieth juzu and pray qiyam, reading from it at night. This way you will truly taste the sweetness of qiyam.  Those who say they do not feel very submissive in their prayers should try to do this and see the result.  The second book that will take you into the world of the Qur’an and allow you to enjoy reading it is called Fee thilal Al Qur’an (In the Shade of the Qur’an) by Sheik Sayyed Kutb - read the thirtieth juzu.  You will find that you understand it fully.  The book comprises six parts, but you only need the last part; you can even borrow it in case it is expensive.  The fourth book is Riyad Assaliheen (The Gardens of the Pious) by Al-Imam An-Nawawi.  This book has several chapters, for example, explaining kind treatment towards parents, it will state all the authentic ahadith only on this topic. Qiyam, praying in the mosque and many other topics are dealt with in a relevant chapter that states all the authentic ahadith.  You will be able to learn the Prophet’s tradition and become knowledgeable.  To memorize it, read a chapter then say it aloud in the mosque where you pray.  At the beach resort gather your family and suggest reading for them daily from this book for only ten minutes.  Gather your friends or neighbors and try this idea.  If you follow these steps, by the end of the summer, you will have memorized the whole book.  These are the books I recommend.  If you read them this summer they will give you a new insight.

 

9)      The next question is, “Are there any particular specifications for summer clothes for boys and girls?”

 

Firstly, let us consider the answer for men.  There is no specific uniform for men in Islam.  They can wear what they like as long as it does not display the shape of their private parts.  They can follow the code of dress of the people of the country.  The only warning is that when you go to the beach, never wear swimming trunks that shape the private parts.  This is not suitable.  It is also not appropriate for men to go walking in the streets in their swimming trunks, out of decency.

 

As for women, there are two areas, women who wear hijab (the headscarf) or those who do not.

 

For those who wear the hijab, never feel embarrassed of your hijab.  You lose a great deal if you feel that, especially on the beach.  Do not think, “I am the only one making things difficult for myself, the rest of the girls are free.” Every year, we hear of girls taking off their hijab in summer.  Beware of that. Would anyone feel embarrassed of obeying Allah?  On the contrary, you are excelling.  We have just been saying the hadith narrated by Ma'qil Ibn-Yasar who reported that Allah's Messenger said, “Worshiping during the period of widespread turmoil is like emigration towards me.”[15]

 

Let me express to you a beautiful thought.  Do you know why Allah imposed the hijab on women?  You are going to say to protect women and society. This is true, but there is another purpose, and it is a gift to women.  Allah does not want to confine Islam to mosques.  He wants Islam to be widespread, and its aspects to be evident in society.  Imagine if I went to the street and started knocking on doors, asking people to pray.  I would be considered crazy.  We need a way to remind people of Allah without resorting to speech.  On whom do we bestow this honor?  Men or women?  Men have been given many things, such as prayers in mosques, etc.  We want to give women something else.  Take this scarf and wear it in public; that way you will have helped spread the religion of Allah.  Every time someone sees you, you will earn a hasanah[16].  For example, two girls are walking down the street, one veiled and one unveiled, and they are talking, not necessarily about religion.  Every time someone sees them, the veiled girl is earning a hasanah.  Why would you feel embarrassed?  You should raise your head high and say, “I am obeying Allah and earning a reward from Allah for that!”  Let alone if you where in a place where people say, “Why are you wearing the veil here?”  You have to say, “I am obeying Allah, and I do not feel embarrassed.”

 

What about women who do not wear hijab?

 

We are not upset.  I would just like to remind women who wear the hijab that this is not the epitome of your faith, not at all; this is just the beginning.  We want you to become a success in your life, with a good understanding of it, and a success in society.  Hijab is one of the obligatory aspects, but it is not the only thing, and it is not everything.

 

With regards to women who do not wear the hijab, what should their dress code be?

 

Some might say, ‘She is not veiled so she can wear what she wants.’ We only have one thing to request from her. You do not want to wear the hijab.  We still love you, we will pray for you and ask Allah to give you the strength to take this step, but please beware of clothes that can send you to Hellfire.  You might wonder, ‘are there really clothes that send you to Hellfire?  Is it not a case of being veiled or not?’  No, you could be unveiled, and it is a problem, but it is not as heinous as being unveiled and wearing revealing clothes.  I urge our girls to avoid following these trends, such as wearing tight tops, or short ones that reveal the stomach, or getting piercings and tattoos.  Is it true that this is happening in our countries?  I ask you, grand-daughters of Sumayyah and Asma’[17], is that really possible?  How do parents let their daughters do that?

 

I urge parents to guide their daughters correctly, but not to argue with them.  I know that girls present here are not like that, while those girls who are to blame will not listen to what I say.  Be the voice that addresses this issue.  Tell the girls, “You do not want to wear the hijab, but avoid this way of dress.”

 

Abu-Huraira reported that Allah's Messenger (SAWS) said, “Two are the types of the denizens of Hell whom I did not see: people having flogs like the tails of the ox with them and they would be beating people, and the women who would be dressed but appear to be naked, who would be inclined (to evil) and make their husbands incline towards it.  Their heads would be like the humps of the camel inclined to one side.  They will not enter paradise and they would not smell its odor whereas its odor would be smelt from such and such distance.”[18]

 

There is a type of person who will not smell it.  It does not mean that they will not enter heaven; it means that they will be late in entering it.  It is as if he is describing the current situation, as if he sees them.  We urge you not to fall under this category.  If you do not want to wear the hijab do not go this far, I ask you not to do this.

 

The penultimate question is, “problems between us and our parents become more frequent during the summer.  They want something and we want something else, how do we deal with our parents?”

 

The problem is that you are full of energy and your parents are worried about you.

 

Please have mercy on your parents.  You could be a pious person, who avoids sins, but you leave everyday without telling them were you are going.  When you come home, you confine yourself to your room, even if it is to read Qur’an.  In the eyes of Allah, you have committed a great sin and you have upset Him.  Read as much as you want, but it will do you no good.  Whether you are a religious person or not, your parents enjoy your company and you deprive them of the basic joy of talking to you. 

 

Why would a grown son go out without telling his parents where he is going, and remain absent for over a day, then call and say that he is in another city?  This is disrespectful to his parents.  Do not say that they are watching television and I want to read Qur’an; sit with your parents, talk to them, and have mercy on them.  Parents long for conversations with their children, and they love it when their children open their hearts to them.  Girls who have barriers between them and their parents and do not tell their mothers anything should try to break these barriers.  Try your best to talk to them and come up with things to have a conversation, to make them feel that you want to involve them in your life.

 

I say to the girls and boys, who keep everything from their parents, seize the summer as an opportunity to get closer to your parents, have mercy on them if you find them overprotective and do not give up by saying that you are fed up with their over-protectiveness.  Be gentle with them, for they see all the dangers in the world.  Try to balance between the time you spend with your friends and the time you spend with your parents. 

 

During the summer, you want to go out with your friends and return home late. Nevertheless, try to come back early at least twice a week.  You don’t have to spend every night with your friends.  Excuse yourself for half an hour to go and see your family.  This does not make you a child but a responsible adult.  Spending time with your parents is not a sign of childishness but maturity. Being undutiful to parents is more common in the summer.

 

10)  We have one question left. I think that the first question was very important if you still remember it, and that was to set yourself a goal.  Together with the last question, these are the most important two questions.  It is, ‘what is the greatest thing you would advise us to do during the summer? What is the deed of great value that if done would make this the greatest summer of our life?

 

I think that your greatest achievement this summer, during the two and a half months that end with the beginning of September, is to love Allah. If you manage to make Allah love you during this summer, you can count yourself among the luckiest. This is an important message for you this summer: promise yourselves that this summer will not pass until His love fills your heart and senses.

 

One ayah says what can be translated as, “So know that there is no god except Allah…” (TMQ, 47:19).  We already know that.  “So know” here means to feel the presence of Allah, to feel that He is the only God; sense that He fills your heart and soul.

 

Another ayah says what can be translated as, “Allah bears witness that there is no god except He” (TMQ, 3:18).  Can you say it and feel it with all your heart that there is no god but Allah and that you love Him?  This is how much He loves you:

 

It is narrated by Abu Huraira that Allah's Messenger (SAWS) said, “Our Lord, the Blessed, the Superior, comes every night down on the nearest Heaven to us when the last third of the night remains, saying, “Is there anyone to invoke Me, so that I may respond to invocation?  Is there anyone to ask Me, so that I may grant him his request?  Is there anyone seeking My forgiveness, so that I may forgive him?”[19] I am telling you this to make you love Him, and you must see how much he loves you.

 

Try to appreciate how much He loves you when he calls upon Jibril (AS) (Gabriel). It is narrated by Abu Huraira that Allah's Messenger said, “If Allah loves a person, He calls Jibril (AS), saying, 'Allah loves so and so, O Jibril, love him.' So Jibril would love him and then would make an announcement in the Heavens: 'Allah has loved so-and-so therefore you should love him too.' So all the dwellers of the Heavens love him, and then he is granted the pleasure of the people on the earth.”[20]

 

The following hadith will show you how much He loves you. On the authority of Ibn-Abbas, Allah’s messenger transmitted the following from the Blessed and Great Lord, “Verily Allah recorded the good and the evil and then made it clear that he who intended good but did not do it, Allah recorded one complete hasanah in his favor, but if he intended it and also did it, the Glorious and Great Allah recorded ten to seven hundred virtues and even more to his credit. But it he intended evil, but did not commit it, Allah wrote down full one good in his favor. If he intended that and also committed it, Allah made an entry of one sayyi’a[21] against him.”[22]

 

I am encouraging you to love Him.  Make it your intention to love Him this year.  I will tell you what to do in order to love Him; I just want to set your heart in the right direction first.

 

You can see how much He loves you when He addresses Dawud (AS) (David), “O Dawud! If those who are led astray from My path (i.e. turn their backs on Me) knew how much I long for their penitence and yearn for their repentance, they would pine away with longing to seek Me. O Dawud, these are My feelings towards those who are led astray from My path (i.e. turn their backs on Me), imagine, then, how great My love is for those who seek (and follow) My path.”[23]

 

Listen to how He loves you when He calls. It is narrated by Anas that the Prophet (SAWS) said, "My Lord says, 'If My slave draws nearer to me by a span (a hand), I draw nearer to him by a cubit; and if he draws nearer to Me by a cubit, I draw nearer to him by the span of outstretched arms; and if he comes to Me walking, I come to him running."[24]

 

The Lord of the worlds is saying, “I come to him running”; are you still unable to sense Him?

 

When was the last time you prostrated in total submissiveness out of love for Him?

When was the last time your tears flowed out of love for Him?

Why have you become so harsh-hearted?

 

Listen to this hadith: Abu-Mu'sa reported Allah's Messenger (SAWS) as saying that Allah, the Exalted and Glorious, stretches out His hand during the night so that the people repent for the faults committed from dawn till dusk and He stretches out His hand during the day so that the people may repent for the faults committed from dusk to dawn. (He would accept repentance) before the sun rises from the west (before the Day of Resurrection).[25]

 

Allah's messenger said, “Allah is more pleased with the repentance of His slave than any one of you is pleased with finding his camel which he had lost in the desert.”[26]

 

Where are repentance and devotion to Him?  Where are the fajr (dawn) prayers and the qiyam (night prayers)?  Where are the tears when you are in His hands?  Where are the arms raised to the sky to tell Him that you love Him?

 

Listen to what people did to tell Allah they love him.  Listen to what the Prophet's supplication, “O Allah, I ask You to grant me your love, and the love of those who love You, and the love of the deeds that bring us closer to You.”[27]

 

Listen to the poetry of Hassan Ibn-Thabet:

 

At Your door I will stand

To none but You I will strive

 

My dress, with contentment I will weave

And pride I will have, for none but you I worship

 

In the rising dawn I will acclaim,

When “Who is your god?” is exclaimed

 

My God, the Creator of the universe

To none but you I strive

 

My God, the splitter of the daybreak

For being your servant, myself, I pride.

 

Listen to these verses said in the love of Allah:

 

When life is full of bitterness

All I ask for is Your sweetness

 

When people show displeasure

All I want is Your grace

 

May ties between You and I be strong

And let people do me wrong

 

All is bearable if with me Your love you entrust

For all that is above dust will be dust.

 

When will our hearts soften towards Allah (SWT)?

Don't you long for a prostration where you feel that you own the world?

Don't you long for the feeling that He is pleased with you?

Don't you long for a dawn prayer that will bring with it a sense of peacefulness and mercy that you have never known before?

Don't you wish, when faced with a sin, to resist it, and that thereafter Allah keeps away this sin from you until you die?

Don't you long for that meeting in heaven when He asks you, “I am pleased with you, so are you pleased with Me?”

Don't you long for that meeting in heaven when he says, “You owe this standing to My mercy, ask for what you want and I will grant it to you.”

Don't you long for having as a roof to your house in heaven the throne of the All-Merciful, to be able to speak to Allah, day and night?

Do you want to achieve all of these things?

Do you want to feel them in this life?

 

I swear to you, the most pitiful people are those who depart from this life without ever experiencing its sweetest taste.  The sweetest thing in this life is to feel Allah’s presence and to love Him.  This is the sweetest thing in life, and whoever fails to taste it has not tasted anything at all. He does not know the essence of life.

 

I deplore what happens after Ramadan.  Our resolve was great in Ramadan, but what happens after the month ended? 

Do you remember the tears and the submission and the sweetness of the taraweeh prayers[28]?

Do you remember the sincerity of your supplications?

Does it vanish when Ramadan ends?

 

You can revive some of it during the summer - you have the time to do that.

If you worship Him in the summer resorts while others are busy having fun, he will raise your standing and bring you closer to him.  Try the sweetness of getting closer to Allah (SWT); it is incomparable.  Know that from the first knock, he will open the door.  Allah is very close, he just needs to hear your voice.  He sends us abundant rain but likes the tears that we shed.  The hearts have hardened to the point that it is difficult to cry.  The heart is overwhelmed by rust, and by all the sins that prohibit it from reaching for Allah in total submission.

 

You need determination.  I can give you a recipe to achieve this:

1-     Pray in the Mosque.

2-     Choose pious friends.

3-     Apply the following every night - let us apply it during the summer: wake up twenty minutes before fajr prayer.  Pray two raka’a of qiyam, reading from the Qur’an.  That way you would have read from the Qur’an and prayed at the same time.  Vow to read the entire Qur’an during qiyam in these two and a half months; every day you can read a quarter or two quarters, one quarter in every raka’a, and it will not take you more than ten minutes.  You would have read from the Qur’an and prayed in the last quarter of the night, which is the most beloved time to Allah.  Spend three minutes asking for forgiveness then make your supplication.  Allah answers prayers at this time, so ask for what you wish.  Then when it is time for fajr prayer, perform the prayer in the mosque.  After prayer, on your way home, say the daily invocations.  If for the rest of the day you only pray the five prayers in the mosque, you will have done enough.

 

Try this idea.  Our women should also try it: prayer in the mosque, pious friends, and waking twenty minutes before fajr prayer.

 

You have time during the summer.  If you do this, within a month you will become so attached to Allah, and that sins will seem futile.  You will say to yourself, I will not commit this sin during the day out of fear that He may deprive me of the sweetness of submissiveness to Him at night.  Only then will you feel that submissiveness to Allah is the most beautiful thing of all.

 

I was feeling that a heavy burden was weighing heavily on my heart.  I want to convey two, or rather, three things to you.

 

-             Firstly, as of today set your goal in life.

-             Secondly, let us agree on loving Allah during this summer.

-             Thirdly, do not forget kindness to your parents during the summer.

 

Finally, set yourselves a daily program during the summer.

 

In summary:

  • Wake up twenty minutes before fajr.
  • Pray in the mosque (women should try to pray in congregation at home).
  • Say the morning invocations then go back to sleep.
  • Wake up again at nine o’clock (sleeping from 5:30am till 9:00am); those who work would go to work, and young people should go to summer camps or join courses (to learn computer literacy or the internet or a language), something which applies equally to girls as well.

 

Idleness is the greatest danger for girls.  Satan targets the idle. Never be so free that you have nothing to do with your time other than wake up at 2pm. Go and learn something: driving, how to use a computer, internet, tajweed, or encourage your friends to become more religious. I urge the girls not to waste their time this summer.

 

We do not want you to work all day, it is summer and we want you to have fun too.

  • Come back at lunchtime and rest.
  • From 6pm to 8pm, alternate daily between sports and reading. 
  • Between maghrib (sunset) and isha (evening) prayers, alternate: on one day you learn tajweed and on the other you go out with your friends.  Leave two days a week after isha to spend with your parents and family.

 

Is it possible to apply this program or not?  I believe it is possible.

 

Finally, I ask Allah to forgive us all.


 

[1] TMQ=Translation of the Meaning of the Qur'an.  This translation is for the realized meaning, so far, of the stated (Surah:Ayah)  of the Qur'an.  Reading the translated meaning of the Qur'an can never replace reading it in Arabic, the language in which it was revealed.

[2]  Translator's note:  The majority of university students in Egypt choose their university on the basis of the credits they get after high-school (Thanawia A'ama) rather than choosing what suits their actual abilities or skills.

[3] SAWS= “Sala lahou alaihi wa sallam”meaning Allah’s Prayers and Blessings be Upon him.

[4]  Sahih Bukhari "Wedlock, Marriage". Volume 7, Book 62, Number 4.

[5] AS : “Alaihi Sallam” meaning Allah’s peace be upon him.

[6] Sahih Bukhari, “One-fifth of booty to the cause of Allah”. Volume 4, book 53, number 411.

1 Umrah is a short kind of pilgrimage which is optional and can be performed at any time.

[8] Raka'a is one unit of prayer.

[9] Tajweed is the system of rules regulating the correct oral rendering of the Qur'an. It is believed to be the codification of the sound of the revelation as it was revealed to Prophet Muhammad, and as he subsequently rehearsed it with the Angel Jibril (Gabriel). Thus the sound itself has a divine source and significance, and is significant to the meaning. 

[10] SAWS: Salla Allah alayhe Wa salam (All Prayers and Blessings of Allah be upon him).

[11] RA: Radya Allah anho  (May Allah be pleased with him/her).

[12] AWJ: Azza-Wa-Jal (Glorified and Sublime be He).

[13] Qiyam: optional night prayer

[14] Authenticated Hadith in Sahih Muslim, book 41, hadith 7042

[15] Authenticated Hadith in Sahih Muslim, book 41, hadith 7042

[16] The reward recorded for performing a good deed, to be accounted for on the Day of Judgment.

[17]  Great female companions of the Prophet (SAWS).

[18] Authenticated hadith in Sahih Muslim, book 24, Hadith 5310

[19] Authenticated hadith in Sahih Bukhari, Book 21 Hadith 246

[20] Authenticated hadith in Sahih Bukhari, Book 93, Hadith 577

[21] The punishment recorded for performing a bad deed, to be accounted for on the Day of Judgment.

[22] Authenticated hadith in Sahih Muslim, Book 1, Hadith 237

[23] Hadith Qudsi (sacred hadith)

[24] Authenticated hadith in Sahih Bukhari, Book 93, hadith 627

[25] Authenticated hadith in Sahih Muslim, Book 37, Hadith 6644

[26] Authenticated hadith in Sahih Bukhari, Book 75, Hadith 321

[27] Weak Hadith in Al-Albany, number 1233

[28] Taraweeh prayer: Extra night prayer performed in Ramadan

 

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